thoughts…. i bet you’ve all missed this
anna kate, when you’re feeling down…
- go play tennis
- do a little cleaning, it feels good
- get some homework done that you’ve been stressing about!
- listen to UPBEAT songs
- go on a walk
- eat some fruit
- drink some five-hour energy
- drink some water!
- get OFF of the internet
- smoke some weed
- apply for jobs
- hang out with people
- do chores around the house
- opt for the food at home as opposed to eating out
- strive for the more productive route in life
I feel like I’m slowly losing grasp of my sense of reality.
it’s really starting to scare me how fast this year has gone by… and how wrong all of it feels now. this time, last year, was the turning point of my sophomore year, and in a way, my life. I was making new friends and talking to new people, the school year was coming to an end, and I couldn’t be happier. life felt so right.
now, things are so different. it’s hard to explain, but I kind of feel like life has taken off without me. like the day changes and time moves on endlessly, but my mind is still stuck in the past. like my body is in this life and my mind is in another life. this feels SO incredibly wrong. the worst part of it all, is I feel stuck. I really, really, REALLY want to get out of this mindset, but I’ve tried so many things, and it feels impossible. what really scares me is the thought of getting on meds for this. I don’t want to be dependent on drugs to feel normal. for some reason, that idea scares the living shit out of me. but the thing is, I really don’t know what else to do. and I need to do something quick, because I seriously don’t know how much longer I can stand living like this. :~\
this week
cons:
- my favorite blogger deleted
- they don’t sell my favorite kind of hot pockets anymore
- school was boring and I’m experiencing “junior-itis”
- single on national kiss day lol
pros:
- won first place district championship
- got sum vyvanse
- reached $500 in my bank account for the first time… which means new clothes FINALLY
- a kid on my tennis team thought I spoke spanish fluently
- hung out with dani/eric/brianna last night, went to the talent show which was hilarious, a random really cool park thing, and made smoothiezzz
so overall, I suppose it’s been a pretty nice week. hooray
so basically, I keep wanting to post long-ass text post about my life and all my emotions and whatnot, but then I remember that THAT IS NOT A GOOD IDEA BECAUSE THIS IS THE INTERNET AND EVERYONE CAN READ WHAT I WRITE
ugh -__-
I really wish tumblr was how it was two years ago and not a person from my school knew that it existed
thoughts
- I keep reblogging these question things and get asked literally nothing and I don’t wanna be one of those losers who ask themselves questions so instead I keep deleting them
- I SPENT FIVE FUCKING HOURS ON AN ESSAY THAT SUX
- and I still have another thing to do 4 english
- I need to go to the psychologist pronto cause I’m so emotionless 24/7. I literally don’t even find funny things funny anymore or enjoyable things enjoyable… I just sorta despise everything and pretend to be happy
- on the plus side, I got a 101 on a math test woop woop
- need…..vyvanse…..prescription……now
- fuck all dis shit I’m tired and going to bed
- nite
welp
- my mom’s pissed at me and hates my guts right now
- I’m extremely sunburnt
- I dropped my phone in water and now it’s not working
- life sux
so I guess I’m gonna go cope by stuffing myself with some microwaved fettuccine alfredo leftovers
